Back in Shakespeare's day, the Elizabethan period, most people drank ale or wine all day long. Why? Because the water was not safe to drink. Fermentation kills bacteria , thus, if you wanted to live to see one of Shakespeare's plays you didn't drink the non-potable water, you drank booze. The most popular wine of the era was a spiced, fermented honey wine called mead. Often fruits were added to the fermentation process as well.
You can make your own mead or be lazy like me and buy some. It's not really that hard to find as mead has made a comeback in today's cocktail world. I bought mine online, Chaucers Mead, at BevMo.
"Come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness."
~ William Shakespeare, The Merry Wives of Windsor, Act I, Scene I
Put some of the whipped cream cheese in the baggie near one corner. Twist the baggie, pushing the cream cheese towards the corner then clip a small hole in that corner to create a piping bag. Pour the red sprinkles onto a small plate. Pipe the cream cheese on the rim of your glass then dip into the red cake sprinkles (jimmies). Chill the glass in the freezer.
Add the ingredients to a cocktail shaker filled with ice and shake until chilled.
Strain the cocktail into your chilled glass, garnish with the cherry and serve.