THE HALLOWEEN VISITATION, A Cocktale Story of Horror and Vodka

A Cocktale of Horror and Vodka
By The Martini Diva

Once upon a late night dreary,
as I sat most weak and weary,
to sip some Crystal Head alone
and rest my soul and ease my bones,
there came a knocking at my door.

Knock, knock, knocking at that door,
They kept on knocking evermore!
I dragged my feet across the floor,
(while under breath I softly swore.)

Upon my stoop were birds galore;
at least a gang of ten or more!
Raven black and swathed in gore,
they whispered from their spectral corps, 
"We cannot find a liquor store,
would you share your vodka pour?"

Shocked was I, and very leery,
Black birds begging booze? 'Twas eerie!
So to these specters this I said, 
"Be gone you crows, you spirits dread!
You cannot have my Crystal Head!
So do not beg, do not implore,
I share this Vodka NEVERMORE!"

They took no heed, they would not stop!
So at their heads an ax I chopped.
Feathers flew and squawks arose, 
it froze me right straight to my toes!
When at last their cries grew still,
I threw their corpses on the grill.
Some lemon juice, some herbs, fine ground;
my dinner soon began to brown.
When they were done, most nicely roasted,
With Crystal Head to them I toasted.
©2014 by TheMartiniDiva.Com


Thanks to Crystal Head Vodka and  BevMo for the inspiration.



I've already done several Candy Corn Martinis, including my original, my Sparkling Candy Corn Martini and my Candy Corn Creeptini as well as my Candy Corn Vodka. But when I happened on some fun, over sized candy corn gummy candies, and remembered that October 30th is National Candy Corn Day, I had to add this recipe to my Halloween cocktail line up, cocktail being the operative word since this old family recipe won't fit in a martini glass!

In fact, it doesn't go in a glass at all, it goes in a jar! Serving cocktails in jars is a trending thing lately. I think it has to do with the popularity of modern day moonshine and, since this is made with homemade candy corn moonshine inspired by my Granny's recipe, it's a perfect fit. After all, it is Corn Moonshine!

First, you have to distill your
Candy Corn Moonshine!

(Since I don't have Granny's still anymore and can't brew up some real corn likker, I've had to make some modern day adjustments to the old family recipe.):
1 Cup Candy Corn Gummy Candy
1 Bottle of Vodka
DIRECTIONS: Combine together in a 2 quart canning jar and let this sit a spell while the candy dissolves. A good 24 hours ought to git 'er done. Shake the bottle up good whenever you pass by. Once your candy has mostly dissolved, strain the whole passel of 'shine through a clean cloth into a nice clean mason jar. No need to age, Granny never did.


1/2 C. Candy Corn Moonshine (Vodka)
1/4 C. Pineapple Juice
1/4 C. Orange Juice
Juice of Half A Lemon
1 Tablespoon Grenadine
Orange Sugar Crystals
Candy Corn Gummies
Half Orange Slices

Dip your glass rim into some of that there candy corn moonshine then into the orange sugar crystals then chill in the ice box. (The good 'un in the house, not the old 'un on the porch) Add the lemon juice, orange juice, pineapple juice and candy corn moonshine to a large jar filled with ice and shake 'er up 'til chilled. Pour into a nice cold jelly jar filled with some fun ice cubes, float the grenadine (which will sink to the bottom) and make it right purty with the candy corn gummies and slices of orange.

Sit on yer porch and enjoy but put yer shotgun in the cupboard. Ya'll don't want to mistake the li'l Trick or Treaters for the revenuers while yer in yer cups!

FYI, here's just a few other names for moonshine:
White Lightening, Kickapoo Juice, Blue John, Cat Daddy, Hooch, Happy Sally, Mountain Dew, Red Eye, Rot Gut, Tennessee White, Wild Cat

Another bit of moonshine trivia:
NASCAR grew out of moonshining! Yep, those good ole boys who learned their driving skills on the backroads of moonshine country took the souped up cars they designed to outrun Johnny Law to the racetracks after Prohibition and so began the start of NASCAR! Read more about the beginnings of NASCAR and Junior Johnson here.

Here in moonshine country we don't hide crazy. We parade it on the porch and give it a cocktail!
~ Anonymous

National Candy Corn Day is October 30th

Updated 10-2020

DIRTY Bloody Mary

Every body's heard of a Dirty Martini but how many of you have tried a Dirty Bloody Mary? It's one of my favorite ways to enjoy a Bloody and I really like enjoying Bloody Marys. I love how the olive brine cuts the sweetness you can sometimes experience with bottled tomato juices. Plus it gives me a great excuse to load up on the olive garnishes.
This is also a great way to drink some "hair of the dog" (Ah heck, it's Halloween. Let's call it hair of the werewolf!) to combat the toxic waste of overindulgence! Which is why this glass with the skull and crossbones is a perfect vessel. It also looks really nice with my bottle of Crystal Head Vodka which is a great quality vodka for a great drink! And it's a pretty cool look for a Halloween cocktail.
Below is my personal recipe for a
2 Oz. Crystal Head Vodka
6 Oz. Tomato Juice
3 Drops Chipotle Hot Sauce
4 Drops Worcestershire Sauce
1/4 Tsp. Prepared Horseradish Sauce
Juice of 1/4 Lime
1 Tbsp. Olive Juice
1 Tsp. Celery Powder
1/2 Tsp Garlic Powder
Cracked Black Pepper
Sea Salt & Smoked Paprika for Rim
Assorted Garnishes, like celery sticks, olives, pickled green beans

Mix together the sea salt and smoked paprika in a flat plate. Dip your glass rim in some tomato juice then into the sea salt and paprika mixture. Fill glass with ice balls then tap the drops of chipotle hot sauce on the ice. Add the Worcestershire sauce, horseradish, celery powder, garlic powder, olive juice, sea salt to your taste and black pepper then pour in the vodka and tomato juice. Stir until well mixed, squeeze in the lime juice and garnish with a good bunch of edible snacks.

Try out all my other

Keep Calm and Drink A
Dirty Bloody Mary!

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Updated 9-2016

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